Just words

Starting over somewhere

maybe, or repeating patterns,

or worrying about losing my job

or doing things wrong

or how all the people in Dolores Park let their dogs run wild around me like how I am always wondering about how other people are waking up every day and if they are bored like how I am bored

or how about bus roars

and that initial crack of a cigarette.

Beginning the fatigue of a good girl

is smelling that cigarette by a pool

and remembering that boys never

love the exact you-- just portraits and

words and how she doesn't do drugs

but how she doesn't care if you do

and she even likes how you used to do too much coke and spend a lot of money on Ikea furniture. 

She is sleeping through panic attacks,

she is tightening her throat,

she is instrumental in you forgetting

the brunette who hated music,

she is reminding you about leaving,

she is choosing words, and she is

somewhere like salt on your cheek.